cheaper, less problems (4 minutes)
Elmo Receives Vasectomy In PSA On Preventing Unwanted Pregnancies (from the Onion)
NEW YORK—In an effort to raise awareness of the medical procedure after the Supreme Court’s overturning of Roe v. Wade, Sesame Workshop released a public service announcement Thursday on preventing unwanted pregnancies that featured Elmo receiving a vasectomy. “There was a little pinch, but that was okay,” said Elmo, who explained to viewers that the elective surgical procedure for male sterilization was safe and over 99% effective in preventing pregnancy, making it a great option for people who don’t currently want to have children. “Elmo was real scared at first, but the nice nurse told Elmo that the doctor can reverse the vasectomy when I’m ready to be a daddy. It only took 15 minutes to make the two incisions on my scrotum, and then snip! Elmo’s infertile now!” Elmo then asked some local children to help him count up to seven to show viewers how many days of recovery he would need before being able to have sex again.
We could use a little of the Onion type of humor after what SCOTUS has done to us and the planet.
A) What Trump crony outed himself when he tweeted “Contrary to her false testimony she was never present when I asked for a pardon.”?
B) The SCOTUS ruled that what body must make specific environmental rules Thursday?
C) A couple of disasters last week. One involved a train/ dump truck collision at an unmarked RR crossing in what state?
D) The other disaster involved the attempt smuggle foreigners into the US in what kind of conveyance in an ultra hot Texas?
E) The 50th star was added to the US flag on July 4th of what year?
F) Just a reminder that our neighbors to the north also celebrate their day of becoming a country (Canada Day) in July on what date every year?
G) What US basketball player was put on trial Friday in Russia on what appears to be a trumped up drug charge?
H) Twenty-five years ago July 1st, what territory did Britain return to China?
I) The nation was agog Tuesday when what young assistant to Trump’s chief of staff Mark Meadows revealed some very damaging information on the insurrection?
J) Immediately following this testimony, the January 6th committee issued a subpoena for what Trump aide?
K) John Adams felt that Independence should be celebrated on July 2 since that was the day that what happened?
L) July 1, 1863 was the beginning of what major battle of the Civil War?
M) What extreme right wing news website declared Trump was “unfit to be anywhere near power ever again,”?
N) The Big Ten will get much bigger in the next few seasons as it looks like what two schools will apply for membership?
O) In a scary development SCOTUS announced they will hear a case next year that would allow what body to decide how a state’s electoral votes are cast?
P) Who signed their name in the largest letters on the Declaration of Independence?
Q) Finland and Sweden were officially invited to join NATO after what member dropped its objections?
R) What country defaulted on its foreign debt when it failed to make a $100 million interest payment?
S) What section of the transportation industry is experiencing major problems because of short staffing?
T) How many people lived in the United Colonies on July 4th, 1776?
The last seven years were the seven hottest years on record, you f*cking morons. – TheTweetOfGod
And SCOTUS neuters the EPA!
A) Rudy Giuliani
B) Congress instead of the EPA
D) A semi-trailer
F) July 1st
G) Brittney Griner
H) Hong Kong
I) Cassidy Hutchison
J) Pat Cippolone
K) Congress declared independence. The Declaration was released on July 4th.
M) the Washington Examiner
N) Southern California and UCLA
O) the state legislature – and thus democracy will die
P) John Hancock
T) 2.5 million
it’s still kind of wild that we let Putin have three Supreme Court picks. – Jeff Tiedrich
Please have a safe and sane Fourth
More from Elmo – it’s LOL time.
Sent from my iPhone Lauren Robinson Tiffany