This Old Fossil

A Poem by
John Shumaker

Ah Chuck “the man” Grassley,
      
there's just not enough superlative invective ya can say about this old fossil.
        
Well golly gee everything sure is swell Chuck Senator for Life Grassley
puffs up with pride at his SWELL accomplishments
            heck
all the pigs down at the sty in hog wallow Swaledale won't even tolerate
his stench
              they won't even let the Grasster roll
around in the manure pile and muck with them
               even they
have SOME couth
      Golly Gee everything REALLY will be Swell
       
when we get a “two-fer” in this upcoming election in November
          
cuz unlike Republican elephants
      Iowa voters never do forget
 
the two-fer we're gonna get is those two old fosdicks Grassley and
Brandstadt retired once and FOR ALL
         Fully and Completely
           
out to the farm where they can slop all the crap they ever dreamed up
to their hearts content
              far and FOREVER Away from Good
Iowans who have put up with their crap for low these oh too many years
               
Iowans UNITE
                  and take comfort
             
Roxanne is on her way to a NEW DAY for Iowa!
                  
HOORAY!
            and we can finally Chuck the man Grassley
forever,
                  the Grassley time count is still on
                  
as his waning sand pebbles are swiftly falling through the Grassley
Hourglass
                     soon to be emptied
              
the Grassley time count is 180 days and COUNTING!
                               
YEAH!!!