Father Murphy walks into a pub in Donegal, and says to the first man he meets, “Do you want to go to heaven?”
The man said, “I do Father.”
The priest said, “Then stand over there against the wall.” Then the priest asked the second man, “Do you want to go to heaven?”
“Certainly, Father,” was the man’s reply.
“Then stand over there against the wall,” said the priest. Then Father Murphy walked up to O’Toole and said, “Do you want to go to heaven?”
O’Toole said, “No, I don’t Father.
The priest said, “I don’t believe this. You mean to tell me that when you die you don’t want to go to heaven?”
O’Toole said, “Oh, when I die, yes. I thought you were getting a group together to go on a trip right now.”
And now for the weekly quiz. Warning, there may be a few Irish questions in here:
1) Let’s just say I was going to show you my shillelagh. What am I going to show you?
2) An East Harlem (NYC) neighborhood was awakened by what on Thursday morning?
3) Sbarro’s, that ubiquitous mall pizza store, did what Monday in New York City?
4) Warning there may be “too many unintended consequences,” Governor Branstad came out totally against what on Monday?
5) The State of Iowa has been in this business since March 8th, 1934, or 80 years. We are making loads of money from it. What business is it?
6) President Obama ordered the Labor Dep’t to change rules on what group of workers so they may be paid overtime beyond 40 hours per week?
7) Quite a mystery surrounds an airliner that disappeared somewhere around Asia after the plane took off from what airport?
8) He wins again! Who, once again, was the darling of the CPAC conference winning their presidential straw poll with 31%?
9) March 17th is St. Patrick’s Day. What happened on that day that connects it to St. Patrick?
10) The Iowa state senate voted to make what a primary offense for adults (a reason to stop your car and give you a ticket)?
11) What the heck? What senator got pretty bent out of shape when she found out that senators were being spied on along with millions of other Americans?
12) Well we had a something that sort of resembled a filibuster Tuesday night. Who was talking and what were they talking about?
13) President Obama went to visit his Irish ancestors in what small town in Ireland a few years back?
14) The New York Times reported last week that what politician handed out pieces of steel from the WTC towers to politicians he wanted endorsements from?
15) March 19th next week is the anniversary of what?
“May yas be a half an hour in heaven before the devil knows yer dead”
An old Irish saying (used to hear it every week on the Irish Rover show)
1) a big wooden (usually oak) club
2) an explosion caused by a gas leak.
3) filed for bankruptcy
4) medical marijuana
5) the Liquor business.
6) salaried employees
7) Kuala Lumpur
8) Randy Paul
9) He (St. Patrick) died.
10) texting while driving.
11) Diane Feinstein
12) Democrats were talking about climate change
14) Chris Christie
15) Our invasion of Iraq in 2003.